Pause, Rewind, Play.

It isn’t the innocence depicted by the imperfect drawing of a butterfly that little Gbemi showed her Grandma that brought tears to Grandma’s aged eyes. It is something far more than that.

 “Grandma, why are you crying?” Gbemi notices Grandma’s change of countenance and asks with such naivety.

But Aduke, her grandmother isn’t fooled. She knows quite well that the first question would open up many more which she would eventually be fed up of answering. It isn’t Gbemi’s fault. Most four year old are extremely curious.

“You remind me of your mother when she was your age.” Aduke manages to say to avoid further interrogations.

“What was mummy like when she was my age?” Aduke’s cover -up technique didn’t seem to work this time.

“She was just as beautiful as you are, my dear!”

The truth is Bunmi, Gbemi’s mum, was not anything close to beautiful at that age. She was a very sickly child. At age two, Bunmi was diagnosed with a genetic renal disease that left her on the hospital bed for most part of her growing years. Aduke remembers vividly that moment the doctor told her the result of the many tests conducted. It was just like yesterday. How could she forget how that patient and empathetic pediatrician struggled to explain what that ‘big’ medical term meant to her simple mind? She actually thought she was prepared for the worse but when the worse finally came, she discovered she wasn’t ready for it.

That night after the results came out, fear visited Aduke. It didn’t come alone. It came with torment. At that point, Aduke was constantly reminded that her daughter would not only die but she would also suffer before she eventually kicks the bucket. What mother would bear to watch her innocent child groan in pain and then die a cheap death? Aduke was just inconsolable. God must be a wicked God! Why should He give her such a lovely child and then allow the devil to afflict her so? Although that speckle of hope remained, most times it was easy for Aduke to wish that her emaciated unhealthy daughter should die instead. At least, that would save her the stress and the pity she got from even those she never knew. To make matters worse, some doctors concluded that Bunmi would never survive that critical life-threatening ordeal.

But God did it! The moment He did it, Aduke couldn’t tell. It was so hard to tell that the same Bunmi would be a mother of children today. If only Aduke had realized that God had great plans despite that trying period, she wouldn’t have been so agitated. Aduke was forced to conclude that no situation is worth worrying over. If only we could always remember that all things will surely work for our good, then we wouldn’t give in to all the cares of this present world. God has it all under control. A writer is never anxious about the end of a story. Rewind it, fast forward it, pause it, play it, do whatever you like with the story, the writer knows the end of it. Why worry about situations in your life? The writer (God) already knows it will end well.