‘Til Christmas

The good things of life are not evenly distributed. This, Mrs. Tana was very much aware of. Unlike their neighbours, Mr. and Mrs. Oliver who had been having very tough times, Mr. and Mrs. Tana had recorded the best year of their marriage so far. Not only did the good Lord bless her husband with a better job, she also got double promotion at work. They completed the building in the village and also the one in the city. In addition, the couple bought two brand new cars. It seemed for them ‘everything na double double’ indeed.

Although the relationship between the two families could not be described as anything cordial, they were conscious of what was happening in their lives. The fence that separated them did not stop any secret. The other day, Mrs.  Tana heard an angry creditor demanding settlement of a loan Mr. Oliver had used to pay his wife’s hospital bills. Mrs. Tana got to know that Mrs. Oliver was diabetic and that Mr. Oliver was managing to sustain his family on a part time contract job. Overcome with empathy, Mrs Tana realised that life had not been fair and decided to talk her husband into helping their neighbours. Then, she remembered how ‘poor and proud’ Mrs. Oliver had been. “Anyone expecting help should be humble enough to get it”, she thought to herself. Eventually, she talked her husband into helping the neighbours but they agreed to present cash and food items to Mr. and Mrs. Oliver at Christmas since Christmas was only a month away. And at Christmas, their bonuses at work will be more than sufficient to offer reasonable gifts.

On Christmas Eve, Mrs. Tana felt it was necessary to approach their neighbours first in solidarity before transporting the gifts. She knocked on their old rusty gate but got no response. Another neighbor hinted that he had seen Mr. Oliver the day before taking their three kids out in their rickety car. Not until Christmas evening did the neighbourhood decide to force its way into Mr. Oliver’s compound when an offensive odour was perceived. Mr. and Mrs. Oliver had committed suicide together!

That year, Mr. and Mrs.Tana learnt a very hard and important lesson of life – Don’t wait until Christmas before lending a helping hand!

In Vogue

Once I went into a departmental store to buy a commodity. I was surprised at how many brands of that commodity I could find in the market. Finding different brands was one thing, making up my mind about which one to settle for was another. One of the store attendants walked up to me and I soon discovered he had sensed my confused state from afar.

“They are all nice brands but pick this one. It’s in vogue”, he assured.

Of course, it was in vogue. I remember watching the ad on TV the other day. How amusing it was! The radio advert was quite humorous as well. No one should forget such comedy in a hurry. But the expression ‘in vogue’ which the store attendant uttered sealed the deal. My mind was made up and I was ready to settle for what was in vogue. If only to feel among, I was more ready to spend my money on that particular brand.

Two weeks later, I became disappointed at the product. The ‘in-vogue’ brand failed to meet my need! As human beings, there are so many behaviours, accessories, properties, careers etc. that are in vogue –indeed very popular- but aren’t exactly what we need. Only God knows how many things we have dabbled into just because we want to measure up with our friends and colleagues. Apostle Paul’s words come to mind –“All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any” (1 Corinthians 6:12). The fact that everyone does or has it isn’t enough reason to get something. Sometimes, it may be necessary to ask yourself if what you desire is really a want or a need. I guess that will help one to set priorities right.

So when next you desire a commodity, career, property or whatever thing is in vogue, ask yourself again and again, ‘is it a want or a need or just something in vogue?’

His First Rainbow

"Mummy, when are we going to see another rainbow?"
My son kept asking weeks after he saw a rainbow for the very first time. He had seen rainbows before but only in cartoons and storybooks. This time, the rainbow was real, big, bold, beautiful and of course, colourful. At first, he was startled at how much the rainbow stretched across the skies but after I told him the story behind the rainbow, he fell in love with it. It didn't end there. My son kept telling everyone that he saw a rainbow for the very first time. He told of how big and beautiful the Lord God made the rainbow with all the colours He painted in those arches. The height of it was when he kept pestering his dad to paint a rainbow for him so could show his teachers and friends at school. Not only that, he kept longing for another experience. How very excited and elated he was!

For me, I was awestruck when I saw that rainbow but it was not so much of a big deal to me. Why? I had seen several rainbows before. Unlike my son who was eager to tell everyone about his encounter with the beautiful work of nature, I was not willing to tell anyone about it, at least not anymore. My son kept reliving his experience while mine expired the moment the rainbow disappeared into the clouds. I guess there were more important issues than fantasizing about a 'mere' rainbow. Not that I do not appreciate the splendour and the covenant between God and mankind that the lovely rainbow represent. I am just over it.

Then I thought about the wonderful work of salvation. How indeed I could compare my son's first rainbow to our first love for Christ. At the point of salvation, one feels so excited and enthusiastic about the Christian journey one is about to embark on. Soon after, one becomes weary of the separated lifestyle. A Christian's familiarity, oftentimes, with the price Christ paid for salvation no longer makes him want to do exploits. He is no more interested in spreading the good news of the awesomeness of a loving God. He is satisfied with keeping the amazing beauty he once beheld to himself. Like me, he is occupied with other issues that may not be profitable to him afterall.

 As true Christians, our salvation should not be a forgotten experience (Philippians 2:12) or one that comes with a sensation when there is an anointing service in church. Like my son and his first rainbow, we should cherish Christ's sacrifice to redeem us back to God and be ever ready to tell the whole world about how beautiful our God is (James 5:20).

Pause, Rewind, Play.

It isn’t the innocence depicted by the imperfect drawing of a butterfly that little Gbemi showed her Grandma that brought tears to Grandma’s aged eyes. It is something far more than that.

 “Grandma, why are you crying?” Gbemi notices Grandma’s change of countenance and asks with such naivety.

But Aduke, her grandmother isn’t fooled. She knows quite well that the first question would open up many more which she would eventually be fed up of answering. It isn’t Gbemi’s fault. Most four year old are extremely curious.

“You remind me of your mother when she was your age.” Aduke manages to say to avoid further interrogations.

“What was mummy like when she was my age?” Aduke’s cover -up technique didn’t seem to work this time.

“She was just as beautiful as you are, my dear!”

The truth is Bunmi, Gbemi’s mum, was not anything close to beautiful at that age. She was a very sickly child. At age two, Bunmi was diagnosed with a genetic renal disease that left her on the hospital bed for most part of her growing years. Aduke remembers vividly that moment the doctor told her the result of the many tests conducted. It was just like yesterday. How could she forget how that patient and empathetic pediatrician struggled to explain what that ‘big’ medical term meant to her simple mind? She actually thought she was prepared for the worse but when the worse finally came, she discovered she wasn’t ready for it.

That night after the results came out, fear visited Aduke. It didn’t come alone. It came with torment. At that point, Aduke was constantly reminded that her daughter would not only die but she would also suffer before she eventually kicks the bucket. What mother would bear to watch her innocent child groan in pain and then die a cheap death? Aduke was just inconsolable. God must be a wicked God! Why should He give her such a lovely child and then allow the devil to afflict her so? Although that speckle of hope remained, most times it was easy for Aduke to wish that her emaciated unhealthy daughter should die instead. At least, that would save her the stress and the pity she got from even those she never knew. To make matters worse, some doctors concluded that Bunmi would never survive that critical life-threatening ordeal.

But God did it! The moment He did it, Aduke couldn’t tell. It was so hard to tell that the same Bunmi would be a mother of children today. If only Aduke had realized that God had great plans despite that trying period, she wouldn’t have been so agitated. Aduke was forced to conclude that no situation is worth worrying over. If only we could always remember that all things will surely work for our good, then we wouldn’t give in to all the cares of this present world. God has it all under control. A writer is never anxious about the end of a story. Rewind it, fast forward it, pause it, play it, do whatever you like with the story, the writer knows the end of it. Why worry about situations in your life? The writer (God) already knows it will end well.

                                                                                                                                        

Team Player?

As a successful engineer, Tega wouldn’t have chosen another career even if she had it on a platter of gold. Her love for the profession was ignited when she was only in primary school. Thanks to Aunty Bimpe, a neighbor whom she admired so much.  Aunty Bimpe was not just an engineer; she was her role model and mentor. Virtually all the kids in the neighborhood loved her. She was unique, kind and soft-spoken.

For Tega, becoming an engineer wasn’t an easy task. Nobody said it would be. With determination and resilience, she finally turned into the person of her dreams even in a male dominated sector. She remembered all the sleepless nights, the failures, re-sits and now the benefits of a ‘never say die’ spirit. With every engineering qualification and certification you can imagine, Tega suddenly turned every employer’s desire.  She wouldn’t forget in a while the comments her first employer wrote in one of her commendations letters-“…always going the extra mile to solve any problem.” Now seven years have passed with lots of promotions to her credit. She was very proud of what she had become.

        “High time I sought greener pastures”, she thought to herself.

And at the next bigger opportunity, she jumped at it. Not long after she applied was she called for the written test. She excelled! On the day of the oral interview, she woke earlier than usual, got the kids ready and headed straight for her iPad in readiness for whatever tough question coming her way.

            “Good morning”, Benjamin said grudgingly.

Tega simply ignored. At Benjamin’s voice, she frowned even more. Benjamin is Tega’s husband of four years. Their marriage has been blessed with two lovely children but had mostly been characterized by serious arguments and quarrels with constant threat of separation and divorce. Benjamin sometimes wondered if Tega was the sweet and lovable lady he had fallen in love with.  Last night’s quarrel ended with Tega’s favourite sentence – “Is it because my career is more successful?” Somehow that sentence usually drove Benjamin really mad and then he would leave the house in anger to avoid any act of violence on his part. Of a truth, the financial pillar of their home was Tega. Her enormous salary paid all the bills. Benjamin only managed to contribute whenever he had from the once-in-a while commissions he got from his contract job.

Tega wasn’t in the mood for settlement. She had better things to attend to and top on the list was the interview. She left the house without saying goodbye and worse, without telling her husband that she wanted to change her job. Why would she? After all, she was the bread winner. This wasn’t the first time she would take decisions without informing her husband. It wasn't going to be the last either.

At the interview, there were five candidates; she was the second to be called in.

“Your name in full please”, and that commenced the interview. So many questions were posed at her of which she was sure she answered satisfactorily but a certain question not only made her uncomfortable but also made her ponder. One of the panelists had asked her if she was a good team player. She was quick to remind them of her achievements in her current position as a team member but like a detective, a panelist continued to quiz her. He even went further to say that she didn’t look like someone who would be submissive. How very embarrassed she was!

As she drove home that day, she kept thinking of how easy it was for her to work in a team in her office. She was indeed very subservient to her bosses and most of her bosses liked her for being easy to correct. That is her office, not her home. Why would she listen to her bosses’ directions and instructions and never take Benjamin seriously? Why would other women’s husbands control her and never Benjamin? It was like the Holy Spirit descended on her. How did her marriage get to this level? If she had never wanted a man to control her maybe she wouldn’t have gotten married at inception. She realized she may have been blessed by God more than her hubby for a reason. Her blessings shouldn’t be a reason to be rude and insubordinate to her husband. After all, she was technically better than some superiors she had worked with but managed to get along with them quite well. She had been a very bad team player in her own home!

When Benjamin got home that night, Tega went to the door and hugged him tightly.  Benjamin was so surprised.  She did that last when it was

only a year into their marriage. Tega proceeded to serve him his favourite meal and apologized for her unruly behavior the night before and promised to turn from her old ways. That sealed it. From then, she realized she was part of a team and she does not necessarily need to assume the position of a team leader to function effectively.

While You Are Waiting

I am not of this world but I love to keep track of what is going on in the world around me. Like a popular Nigerian woman of God once said, “Don’t be a six thirty Christian (Earthly conscious, Heavenly useless), or a Twelve ‘o clock Christian (Heavenly conscious, Earthly Useless), instead be a Six ‘o clock Christian who is heavenly conscious and earthly useful. I am happy to say I have lots of mentors who have encouraged me to stay focused as a Christian whose final destination is heaven. These unique men and women have also taught me that born again christians too can be extremely successful even here on earth. Gone are the days when Christianity was associated with failure and unluckily, poverty. Well, that’s by the way.

Over the years, I have read about people on both local and international scenes that rise to become forces to be reckoned with in various fields of human endeavor. Unfortunately, I have also experienced some of these people fumble greatly in these positions. Not that I delight in seeing people who have risen to grace fall back to grass. I just feel that there may be something lacking in their lives that causes their downfall. Come to think of it, individuals who become great leaders do not start to exhibit excellent leadership skills the day they reach limelight. That’s why people who just wake up one day to contest for presidency in Nigeria hardly ever win and even if they ‘ll win, they may never last in that position due to the pressure of the office. This means there is a process and unless the process is a thorough one free of any ‘magomago’ as we call it, then people are likely to fumble when they eventually reach the top.

Like a friend of mine said, “the platform will come but prepare the speech first”. You are going to be a wife someday but before you get married to that dream man of yours, ensure that you get all the good attitudes and attributes that will make you stay in that home forever. Who says you will not get to the highest position in your career? You will! But before you get there, do away with all the flaws that can make you fall. Children will come. Just before they come, learn how to be a good parent so that you don’t raise delinquent juveniles. You can always be a renowned apostle of our time but beware of the little yeast that leavens the whole lump. What is my point? My point is that there is a place of preparation. There is a period where you will need to be equipped before you earn that glory. Success doesn’t come cheap and when it does, you lose it cheaply. Sometimes when I don’t get what I ask God for, I simply take it that I am not ready for that thing. I probably need more “years of experience” before heaven can deliver it to me.

So while you are waiting for success in whatever area of your life, confess success every day and learn from other people’s success and failure stories. You can also pick up values from your own mistakes. Know surely that success will come but before it arrives, ensure to get all it takes to sustain it now!